Welcome:
Hello, my name is ___________, and it is my honor to serve as presiding officer over today?s service. The couple and their parents welcome each of you. Your presence at this special event is greatly appreciated. Please, note that _______ and ________ have put together this ceremony, so at the conclusion of the service, you may direct any complaints to them.
Marriage is what brings us together today. In electing to merge their lives together as one, they embark upon a journey that will take the rest of their days to complete. That voyage begins here, this day, this moment, and they are honored and privileged that all of you have decided to share this day with them.
As many of you know, ________ and _______ come from different religious backgrounds. They have decided to write a ceremony that weaves together not only elements of Christianity and Judaism, but Buddhism and Hinduism as well. These spiritual traditions have combined to form one beautiful fabric, symbolic of their lives, into which they will stitch many hours and days and years. Upon this canvas, they hope to incorporate all things, all experiences, into a design that will be their own, and to watch it grow ever larger and more beautiful.
The more earthly fabric under which the bride and groom are gathered here is the chuppah, which symbolizes the home that ________ and _______ will create together. The sides remain open to illustrate that friends and family are always welcome.
The roof of the chuppah is made from Julie?s father?s prayer shawl. It symbolizes the importance of what is beyond ourselves and reminds us of the presence in our hearts of those who could not be with us today.
Not only do ________ & _______ appreciate that you are all here to participate in and bear witness to their special day, they also look forward to having friends and family close by to share in their lives as they work to build a home and family together.
We would like to call on __________ to read a selection that Bride has chosen:
Reading:
Mark Golebiowski From 'The Prophet' by Khalil Gibran
(pg. 69 of Wedding Vows and Traditions)
Love one another, but make not a bond of love;
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other?s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other?s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other?s shadow.
Unity candle:
Austin narrates: At this time, Chris and Julie will light a unity candle. (To ________ and _______ ) The individual candles before each of you represent your lives before today. Lighting the center candle represents that your two lives and two families are now joined in one light.
[________ and _______ and parents light candles]
Blessing: (I want to adapt this. I do not care for the first part of the message much)
Austin reads adapted Buddhist blessing:
________ & _______ : Remember that nothing happens without cause. Your union has not come about accidentally, but is the ordained result of many past lives. Therefore, the tie that exists between you cannot be broken or dissolved.
Remember that happy occasions will come as surely as morning. Remember that difficult times will come as surely as night. When things go joyously, rejoice in each other?s company. When things go badly, shelter yourselves in each other?s compassion. To simply say the words love and compassion is easy. But to accept that love and compassion are built upon patience and perseverance is not. Your marriage will be firm and lasting if you remember this.
At this time, we would like to call _______to read a selection that Groom has chosen.
Reading:
Unending Love by Rabindranath Tagore
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times...
In life after life, in age after age, forever.
My spellbound heart has made and remade the necklace of songs,
That you take as a gift, wear round your neck in your many forms,
In life after life, in age after age, forever.
Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, it's age old pain,
It's ancient tale of being apart or together.
As I stare on and on into the past, in the end you emerge,
Clad in the light of a pole-star, piercing the darkness of time.
You become an image of what is remembered forever.
You and I have floated here on the stream that brings from the fount.
At the heart of time, love of one for another.
We have played along side millions of lovers,
Shared in the same shy sweetness of meeting,
the distressful tears of farewell,
Old love but in shapes that renew and renew forever.
Homily:
Thank you, _____.
It took me about two years to realize that ________ & _______ were a perfect couple and the an additional two months to understand why they had chosen to participate in this unique wedding ceremony. I?d like to help answer the same questions for anyone who still may harbor such questions.
As for their choice of ceremonies:
Both ________ & _______ are proud of their rich ethnic and religious backgrounds and the families that helped shape their personalities and values. They sought to honor each other in a manner that did not supersede either participant. That respect for each other?s upbringings will undoubtedly help shape their marriage.
As for what the pair does or does not hold in common:
_______ is the picture of manners, reserved, steady, and level headed. Clear, concise, and authoritative, she expresses herself with brevity and clarity. Steady and consistent in habits she likes to eat out, but be home in time for bed at 10:00. Her expectations are high: she will not accept an unfulfilling career, an uninteresting topic in a conversation, or a bad meal and she will let it be known clearly when she is not pleased.
Now _____. He is a bit different. His manners sometimes fail to help him make a stellar first impression. It took a bit of time for me to overcome my first impression. It was probably only the second time that we had actually met yet he threw a pool cue at me after I told him that he was being a bit loud in the otherwise empty pool hall. In his defense though he did miss. He can get a little loud. Wake the dead loud, and his choice of language and subjects of conversation have been known to make people blush. He will argue anything from sports to politics providing details and supporting facts during even the most inane debate. He relishes the opportunity to display his mastery of the English language, while using leaps of logic and deft verbal maneuvering. Watching groom can be a joy itself. One moment he is laughing; the next, shouting in righteous fury. In between arguments and rants he is considerate of others points of view, conscientious, curious about the world around him, and open minded. All told groom is easily contented. A hotdog, a beer, and a fun-editing project will keep him happy, yet his behaviors are anything from consistent. Yes, I would say that ________ & _______ are an eclectic pair.
I?d be remiss if I didn?t share some of the things that ________ & _______ have in common that you may not be aware of. For instance: They are both about to turn the dreaded 30, they share many friends in common though many of these friendships were developed independently, they both share a love for reading and writing, they both enjoy dancing, their parents married, bought homes, and had their first children at almost the same times, and both set of parents are happily married. They both are the eldest siblings in their families and both have sisters. They both took family vacations at almost the same place in Michigan and undoubtedly crossed paths in high school and college if not on vacation.
In the end, though, you cannot determine if a couple is meant for each other by an evaluation of similarities and differences pluses and minuses as Ross famously did with Rachel on a popular episode of the TV show Friends.
Adaptability and accommodation are vital components to the success of a relationship. Those of you that are married can attest to that fact. Perhaps, you moderate some annoying little habits, maybe you dress differently or improve your manners, but good couples accept and cherish their spouse for the person that they are. ________ & _______ with all their unique qualities are perfect for each other, because of the love they have for each other and how they make each other feel when they?re together. Hardship and trials will inevitably arise, but they will overcome them together in a manner that would have been impossible as individuals. Most important, they are going to have a fabulous and joyful marriage and have a lot of fun along the journey.
________ and _______ , on a personal note, presiding over a wedding is just as much of a once in a lifetime event for me as getting married will be each of you. I conjure up a lot of crazy ideas, but getting ordained over the internet, so that I could perform marriages may have been one of my most audacious. Many plans fall short of expectations yet other times they succeed beyond imagination. You are good friends and I?m confident that you will be a wonderful couple. Thank you again for letting me share in your special day.
To those gathered here today to witness this marriage, I want to make sure that you were fully aware that Julie and Chris are truly grateful to each of you for making it here. You are all special to the bride and groom, and they hope that you will continue to play a large part in their new life together.
Without further ado, as I know you are all very eager to see this couple get married?
Vows & Exchanging of rings:
Do you _____ promise to love _____ completely today, as you did yesterday and as you will tomorrow?
Do you promise to be there for him (her) when he (she) needs you most?
Will you hold him (her) in your heart just as you hold him (her) in your arms?
Will you share in his (her) dreams, delight in his (her) joys, and comfort him (her) in sorrows?
Will you be his (her) confidant, his (her) counsel, his (her) friend and his (her) lover?
When he (she) is not within your sight, do you promise to hold him (her) in your thoughts?
Answer: ?I do/I Will?
Austin asks ________ and _______ to 'Repeat after me'
(in unison, one line at a time)
You are my life;
you are my dreams;
you are my joy;
you are my love;
Todd hands over rings, ring exchange.
Austin: Final word
As you grow old together and your love matures, may you hold on to the passion and affection for each other that you feel today. And now with the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.
Kiss!
Breaking of the glass:
Someone hands over glass.
Groom breaks glass.
Mazol tov!
Kiss!
S. Austin Muzumdar
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